Dealing with pets

Since the big monster has been slacking for a while, I, Squeak, have decided to show him how to do this blogging thing. He has been spending most of his time in my bed recently, so maybe if I write a fabulous post, he will be so ashamed he will get his lazy self up, and let me sleep in my bed in peace!

Pardon any typos and spelling errors. I may have this nifty extra claw, but I AM still a cat. These funky high-tech devices are entertaining to watch and warm to sleep on, but our two-legged pets are much more adept at using them (one of the few things they do better than us).

I will describe a recent day in my life so all you folk out there can get what a blessing it is to be a cat like me. And understand why Grumpy (what I name the big pet), has been annoying me lately and needs to get back to doing what pets do.

We all know that pets live backwards lives. They sleep at night, the silly things, and then do their pet things during the daylight hours. It’s crazy, but we cats, kind as we are to our pets learn to adapt to accommodate them. Unless of course we want them to do something for us … like scratch that very annoying itch. Or let me out so I can enjoy the dark hours as is my catly right. I allow the silly things to sleep a little of the night, but a few hours before the sun comes up, as only appropriate, I wake up Grumpy and the soft cuddly one that we call Mom, to ensure that one of them allows me out to do my stuff. Now that the weather is cooling off I generally don’t stay out as long. That is only common sense. Of course I have been kind enough to allow Grumpy to sleep in my bed, but he always takes over the whole space and gets growly when I give him a little affection. He really needs to be better disciplined. You would think he would be the one to get up … but no … he just growls at me and rolls back over. He is SOOOO lazy for a pet.

Once the sun comes up, if I am back in the house I always go to wake Grumpy up in an attempt to make sure he gets up and does something useful, but I seem to fail a lot lately. He growls and rolls over again, once again making it difficult for me to sleep in my bed. For most of the day we will wrestle for space on MY bed. It annoys me that I can’t get a solid sixteen hours sleep as appropriate for a cat. I mean I let Grumpy sleep at least four or five hours a day which is more than any pet should really need! And he rarely shows any appreciation (though I admit he does do a mean bit o’ scratching when he is in a calmer mood!) I think that Lucky, who shares the house with me, is too soft with him. We might have to send him out to get trained.

I sleep most of the daylight hours in my bed, only getting up when it is time to eat or to make sure Grumpy and Mom are behaving. But like I said lately Grumpy has taken to never leaving my bed. I think maybe he is sick. Or we have been too lenient with him.

Does anyone know a good human trainer?