I have not been here in a very long while. Not just because I have been off wandering the like the intrepid explorer I am (not). But I keep misplacing my sense of humor, which makes taking note of humorous anecdotes that much harder. Add to that the constant uncertainty of internet access and I have a full set of excuses for not posting here in forever.
Are you buying this?
Anyhoo, now that I have somehow ended up in the jungles of Avon, Ohio, I decided that a new quest was necessary. Let’s call it The Quest for the Holy Joke. What I have today is far from THAT critter, but we ailing comedians need to start SOMEWHERE. Not that I would dare call myself a true comedian.
As you can see, I have NOT lost my talent for getting off the subject.
There are certain guarantees in my travels … one being that if I find myself in any remotely civilized area, I WILL find a bar that I can’t seem to get away from. I am not sure it is my inner alcoholic, my craving for humans, or boredom. My travel throughout the world is noted by the bartenders who remember me (should I be proud of this?). Now there are certain things that EVERY bar has. Booze of course. Bartenders too. Bathrooms. And graffiti.
Eh? you say?
No matter how clean the establishment, no matter how hard working it’s staff, there will always be graffiti somewhere in a bar. Now most graffiti is just drunks or troglodytes trying to establish that they think they can read and write. But every once in a while, one comes across a gem, wall poetry, the diamond on the dingy wall.
This is NOT about one of those.
In my current watering hole, I encountered some wall words that have me completely baffled. I am hoping someone here can shed some light. Our poet had a demand that might be worthy … if I understood it. This is what he wrote:
I have to admit I really have no clue of the intent here. Are they complaining about the price of orange juice? Has Mr. Simpson gotten himself in another pickle? Is there some sort of fruit salad psycho out there kidnapping oranges? Any insight into this matter would be much appreciated.